How Ski Touring Fast-Tracked My Relationship
Love in the Skin Track
When my husband and I first started dating, our weekends weren’t spent at candlelit dinners or cozy movie nights. Instead, they were spent on skin tracks at dawn (WTH did I get myself into), navigating avalanche terrain (also WTH), and pushing our limits deep in the backcountry.
Ski touring and ski mountaineering didn’t just shape our future—it shaped our relationship.
When the Sh*t Hit the Fan
From the start, we faced every challenge head-on: differing skill levels, different risk tolerance, opposite communication styles, he snowboarded - I skied, not to mention the weight of past traumas and experiences. The mountains brought it all to the surface and quickly.
“In the backcountry, communication isn’t just helpful—it’s survival.”
Through late exits on the skin track, avalanche rescue practice, and terrain that tested our limits, we had no choice but to work through it all. It’s a wonder the material you crank through on a ski touring adventure deep in the quiet of the North Cascades for 18 miles.
My First Year Ski Touring
Our first year dating was also my first year backcountry ski touring. While I had years of hiking, snowshoeing, and backpacking under my belt, ski mountaineering was a whole new world. Add in a partner far more advanced than I was, and let’s just say—things got messy.
I cried. I yelled a bit. I left the mountains more than once swearing I’d never go back. There’s nothing like being completely exhausted, staring down a sketchy route, and having to communicate 1,000 fears with someone who thinks dropping off the cliff is faster than traversing around it.
Why It Made Us Stronger
But here’s the thing: those mountains built us. They forced us to fail, to learn, to trust and respect each other, to humble ourselves, to apologize, and to grow—fast. We built communication tools that now serve our marriage every single day.
Do we still argue? Absolutely. But because of those high-stress, high-stakes experiences, we’ve learned to work through disconnects more quickly.
The Marriage Lesson Ski Touring Taught Us
Not all love stories are written in flowers and chocolates. Some are written in avalanche forecasts, long truck drives and early mornings. If you’re like us, you were forged in the raw honesty that comes when you’re pushed to your limits, crapping your chaps on an exposed ledge having bonked 3 hours ago with dusk nipping at your heels.
Ski touring fast-tracked our communication, in that we learned how the other responds to stress early on and often. Because of this exposure we learned how to support one another and that’s why I know this marriage can endure any storm that may come our way.
And above all, it taught me that no one really knows the right way down. Sometimes you have to forge your own path and that through everything, you WILL make it as long as you never, never, ever give up.
SO.. teach your partner something new or embark on that journey together. Be prepared to want to claw each others eyes out on more than one occasion. Find out who the other person is deep down when everything is stripped away.
Bleed a little so the scars will make you stronger.
-Morgan
